February
4, 2019
Greetings from
the folk,
Wherein we will
discuss the LIII Super Bowl; some of the strategies that led to the victory,
and a breakdown of the key plays in the game.
And a brief explanation of Roman numerals.
Thousands of
people, (literally meaning ‘multiple- thousands’, but usually describing ‘more
than we could count’) gathered on Saturday at Gobbler’s Knob, in Punxsutawney,
PA to watch a critical element in the American dialogue unfold.
The town of Punxsutawney
(pronounced ‘po-dunk’) is famous for a few things, not the least of which is
their incredible poor choices in naming anything, the most obvious being their own
town. (See also: ‘Gobbler’s Knob’)
The town is
also famous for a cookie fundraiser at the local United Methodist church, but
that hardly gets any press because of the hoopla (from the French word ‘Yoplait’,
meaning ‘falderal’) over the previously mentioned event on Saturday.
Before we get
to that it is incumbent on us to come to an understanding about the term ‘folklore’
or as some say, ‘folk lore’. The word ‘folklore’
describes how people preserve some tradition or history, usually describing an
oral history; stories passed on from one generation to then next.
We still call
it ‘folklore’ because it sounds homey and friendly, like maybe we got it from
the Farmer’s Almanac or the bible. Otherwise
it sounds like it’s just made up stuff, which takes all of the magic out of it,
not to mention the truth.
So the other
thing that Punxsutawney, PA. is famous for is Punxsutawney Phil, (pronounced ‘fill’)
who is a groundhog. Let’s pause here and
appreciate the fantastic coincidence that a groundhog would also have the very unusual
name of ‘Punxsutawney’ AND live in a town with the name of Punxsutawney. Let alone how weird it is that a groundhog
even HAS a name.
Which makes me
wonder if maybe all animals have names, and all this time we have been completely
ignorant of this fact. There are,
seriously, at least LIII squirrels in my yard and it just boggles my mind that
they may have names, aside from the generic.
Not to mention the deer and the skunk, which I’m not sure why I am mentioning
when I started this sentence with ‘not to mention’.
But I
digress.
On Saturday
more people than we can count showed up to see Punxsutawney Phil live out a
little local folklore. Phil, as I like
to call him, because I am sick to death of typing out the word Punxsutawney, as
you recall is a groundhog. At some point
on February 2, Phil emerges from the ground, somehow prearranged to pop up at
Gobbler’s Knob. If when Phil comes up
into the air he sees his shadow and retreats back into the hole, this will
predict that the majority of the Oscars will be won by white men this
year.
Phil has also predicted
the price of gas (goes up or down depending if he sees his shadow or not) and also
has predicted for two years in a row that the Mexican government will not pay
for a border wall. If he pops out of the
ground and sees his shadow, according to folklore, it means that the
unemployment rate will decline. Also
that we will have several more weeks of winter.
This year the
folks in Punxsutawney were approached by the organizers of the Super Bowl to be
part of their pregame programming, wherein Punxsutawney Phil would predict the
winner of the professional football championship. If Phil did not see his shadow then the
Patriot’s will win, and if he does see it, then the Rams take the trophy--and
several more weeks of winter.
This is not to
say that the game is fixed; that would be a tragedy, dissolving the thrill of the
game, not to mention nullifying millions of dollars in Super Bowl Square
gambling in office pools everywhere. (Note;
office pool gambling is technically not legal and not approved by the National
Football League.) (Note: Vegas gambling alone on the game was over $160 million
in wagers and while gambling is not approved by the NFL, the Super Bowl is
approved by Vegas)
The purpose in
having Phil make any predictions is mostly for entertainment value, not unlike a
football referee trying to enforce rules about excessive violence in a
particular play. Phil, (which is not
really his name, it’s Carl, but lacks the alliteration we all wish we had)
really is like the color commentators from CBS, only he makes his remarks the
day before. So to speak, since he does
not literally speak.
Anyway, I
meant to spend more time reviewing the game but they are sounding the two minute
warning here (a football reference to endear me to the fans) and since I fell
asleep at halftime owing to only three points on the scoreboard and Maroon 5
was singing, I will have to defer to more
qualified observers of the game, which would likely include this squirrel in my
backyard, whose name turns out to be Flushing Frank.
Hope
this finds you folklored,
David
Copyright
© 2019 David Smith
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