Resolve to Celebrate

December 31, 2018

Greetings from the purpose,

We are lucky that we have these guideposts in our days to remind us to pay attention, in case we wander off center.  We get the chance to go back to the direction we know is best for us.  Someone said: ‘Although no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.’

Sometimes it is an event that shakes our perspective, a tragedy in our life, witnessing it in others.  Sometimes a health scare, or something milder like a card from a friend or a reminder from our childhood.  Sometimes it is beauty, like some startling sunrise, or a breathtaking mountain pass.  These little moments come and sometimes we acknowledge them and we change for the better.

This one, the start of a new year, is a common marker for many of us.  It says, like other places in our life, “Hey, if you didn’t notice, another year has passed.  Just wanted to ask how you felt about what you did with it.”  That is not actually on the calendar, thankfully, it is an optional message that comes with the package God gave us.  We get to choose whether to use it or not.

I know not everyone feels the same about New Year’s resolutions.  They can be a pain.  First because we know we should renew our resolve daily and we don’t, so why does this day make any difference?  Let me stop you there because you are already right.  We can resolve any day we want but we don’t always.  Which is why the guideposts are so helpful.

For me, I realize that there are things I want to add and strengthen in my life to make it more satisfying, to make more of the gifts and time I am given.  But I also know that life has a way of distracting from that.  Here is my answer, one that I have turned to before and been glad:  Celebrate.

I’ve learned that the surest way to reinforce what I want more of is to celebrate it when I have it.  It may sound silly, but when my favorite barista gives me a cup of dark roast, and I tell her thank you, that is us celebrating.  Don’t roll your eyes at me unless you have tried it.

We celebrate to acknowledge the importance of people and other wonders in our life.  Christmas, birthdays, anniversaries, successes, overcoming challenges.  It is the passion of us making itself known in our day. 

It is acknowledging a moment that matters.  When I go for a run, or spend time with someone I care for, I feel this urge rise up in me to express my gratitude, the happiness that is bigger than what I should contain.  It is a part of living all the way.  It is a way of honoring the person or the experience too.

Too squishy for you?  I’ll come back to that, but here’s something most people know, whether they apply it or not, and it works for the practical and the squishy.  Celebrate what you want to see more of.

In his book about habits, Charles Duhigg points out that when we reward ourselves for behavior we want, we reinforce the behavior and it becomes automatic; a habit.  The part you should notice here is the reward; it is a mini-celebration.

When you decide to change, or to try new things, you should bring along as many tools to succeed as possible because the day is already fraught with reasons to fail.  My suggestion on both small scale and large, is that you make celebration a part of your ‘resolution’, which will one day grow into your lifestyle.

Imagine you are trying to discipline yourself to write for one hour each day.  Writing the things that are banging around inside of you, simmering and panting on the edges of dreams, haunting you to put into words.  It’s important to you.  But you sit down and can’t stay there for more than five minutes without checking your email or looking out the window with hopes of seeing a squirrel or something.

Suppose you placed a piece of dark chocolate next to your keyboard. And suppose that you worked for an hour and stayed focused and hammered out the thing that was asking to be released.  And then you put that delicious, sensual experience on your tongue and let it reward you.  You celebrated what you wanted more of in your life.  In time you create a habit that is unbreakable.

Whatever it is you resolve to, there will be benefit in celebrating your way there.  There are practical ways of applying this; decide the change you want, begin a practice that leads you there, celebrate every success, grow habits that support what you want.  Repeat.

When you see it at the micro level it is easier to believe in at the macro level.  Imagine this: you want to try new things, you want to make new friends, see more concerts, have more ‘think’ time, play more, love more, be healthier, read a book a month.  I promise you that if at every step along the way, at the big moments and small, you celebrate the process, the changes you want will happen.  Even in the face of challenges and detours.  Choose your direction, choose the way, choose how you will celebrate. 

Another use for the word ‘resolution’ is when it describes clarity.  When we resolve to do something, when we focus on some change we want, we bring our lives into greater resolution.  It’s worth doing, even if you wait til February.

But what makes all of this part of a rich life is the celebration.  Yes, when we make celebration part of the change we want, we are more likely to succeed in one effort or another.  But imagine a year from now, whatever your resolutions were, and you look back and see 365 days of celebrations.  My friend, that is the real purpose of all of this. 

Hope this finds you celebrating,

David

Copyright © 2018 David Smith